Confession of a Bewildered Wife
As January 6th, the Day of Epiphany, marks the end of the holiday season, I feel the time is ripe to reflect on my own holiday season. An epiphany for the Day of Epiphany, if you will.
I could tell of family dinners replete with epic battles between a five-year-old and his parents. (It's amazing the diplomatic success of red velvet cake to overcome a stalemate involving those last two bites of turkey.) I could speak to gift exchanges and reminisces of Christmases past. I am even tempted to attempt a description of the vicious UNO wars.
But I won't.
Why? Because there was something far more troubling that came out of my holiday seasons. I discovered that I am an anomaly among women in a committed relationship.
Apparently most women, particularly those who have been in a relationship for several years, expect their men to divine the perfect gift via osmosis (a.k.a. pick up on subtly dropped hints throughout the year).
Say what!?
Newsflash ladies: men don't work that way. While we make mental notes all year long about things they would love to have, men, God bless them, aren't hardwired that way.
(Heading off the objections now. I recognize some men are very conscientious gift buyers. There are exceptions. They are not who I am talking about. Moving on.)
Why do women torture themselves (and their men) with such unrealistic expectations? It's cruel and unusual punishment.
The best Christmas present you can give your man next year: a list of things you would like to have given as a gift.
That's what I do. And guess what? I got something I wanted for Christmas! Shocker! I opened my gift Christmas morning and loved what my husband had given me. And because I had given him a list, I had no idea which items he had bought, so I was able to enjoy the surprise factor as well.
Easy. Simple. Everyone's happy. Sam was happy because he gave something I wanted. I was happy because I got something I wanted.
It just makes sense. The men in our lives have it tough enough the rest of the year trying to read our moods and our minds. Why not make the holidays a little simpler for them?
I could tell of family dinners replete with epic battles between a five-year-old and his parents. (It's amazing the diplomatic success of red velvet cake to overcome a stalemate involving those last two bites of turkey.) I could speak to gift exchanges and reminisces of Christmases past. I am even tempted to attempt a description of the vicious UNO wars.
But I won't.
Why? Because there was something far more troubling that came out of my holiday seasons. I discovered that I am an anomaly among women in a committed relationship.
Apparently most women, particularly those who have been in a relationship for several years, expect their men to divine the perfect gift via osmosis (a.k.a. pick up on subtly dropped hints throughout the year).
Say what!?
Newsflash ladies: men don't work that way. While we make mental notes all year long about things they would love to have, men, God bless them, aren't hardwired that way.
(Heading off the objections now. I recognize some men are very conscientious gift buyers. There are exceptions. They are not who I am talking about. Moving on.)
Why do women torture themselves (and their men) with such unrealistic expectations? It's cruel and unusual punishment.
The best Christmas present you can give your man next year: a list of things you would like to have given as a gift.
That's what I do. And guess what? I got something I wanted for Christmas! Shocker! I opened my gift Christmas morning and loved what my husband had given me. And because I had given him a list, I had no idea which items he had bought, so I was able to enjoy the surprise factor as well.
Easy. Simple. Everyone's happy. Sam was happy because he gave something I wanted. I was happy because I got something I wanted.
It just makes sense. The men in our lives have it tough enough the rest of the year trying to read our moods and our minds. Why not make the holidays a little simpler for them?
Comments
Shayna, I completely agree. The stuff to step over on the stairs thing amazes me every time. :)